What i read…

Exclusive: Nadia Lee Cohen’s Powerful Portraits of Strong Femininity, Ted Stansfield, AnOther Magazine… Nadia Lee Cohen turns the idea of Male/Female gaze into something quite different…

Power is the key word here – these images vibrate with the stuff. They confront you. Command you. Compel you. Meet your gaze head on. And they are full of contradictions, too: simultaneously retro and modern, they draw on a legacy of British and American cinema, but feel new and current. Likewise they are staged and stylised, but at the same time real and irrefutably raw. Meanwhile, the women themselves display both a vulnerability and a strength, presenting a fictional character and also their true self, or at least a version of it. It’s hard to look away and even harder not to feel something.

… i read that this project took six years to accomplish… i admire the discipline of a woman in her 20’s… i imagine they have fierce ambition and incredible focus…

Inside Nadia Lee Cohen’s New Book of Chameleonic Self-Portraits, Ted Stansfield, AnOther Magazine… not a unique idea, but a unique execution of the idea…

Place: Ikea Parking Lot, Anelise Chen, Believer Magazine… i plunge in to reading the article and immediately like it… as i am reading, i get the strong impression that i am inhabiting the thoughts of a woman… i knew, without having seen who the author was, that it was a woman…

For me, extended time in parking lots has always signified an emergency, precise moments of narrative dissolution: one version of the good life has come apart irretrievably, and you must, humbly, construct another. Outside hospitals and motels, breakups and breakdowns. I paced because pacing feels like the good, primal thing to do when a body is penned in. It’s what lions and tigers do in their zoo enclosures. Back and forth, up and around, prowl, prowl, repeat. I organized my movements by row: up and down the parking rows toward the now-dim signs for exchanges, returns, exit, enter. The circularity of the movements, plus the weird, abstract commands, felt cosmic. I was in an undetermined space of pure matter, performing a ritual of eternal reincarnation, living many lives.

… didn’t love the way this piece ended, but i love the idea of pacing in super large parking lots to clear one’s head, and then, beginning to pay attention to what is in that lot, which is way more than one would think…

Stuff I’ve Been Reading: Rickie Lee Jones, Emma Dabiri, and More, Nick Hornby, Believer Magazine… a set of well written and compelling impressions of the books in question… impressions seems the right word, because i don’t read these as critical reviews, just an accounting of a book enjoyed thoroughly… also, in the course of reading these impressions i encounter the author referring to themselves as ‘he’ again… it happened in the article above, which led me to search for information on the author and confirm that they present as female and refer to themselves as ‘she’… so now i am wondering what is going on… is being gender confusing a thing and i am out of the loop? Hmmm…

… and now i discover that Summer Thomad is not the author of the articles i am reading, but for some reason comes up with the byline when the articles feed through to Feedbin… i circle back and follow the links through to the Believer Mag website and find the actual authors and switch credit accordingly and the pronoun mystery continues because it turns out i am right about the parking lot article, written by a (Asian) woman… her bio on Wikipedia refers to them as ‘her’ and ‘she’ while she self-refers as male in the body of the article… hmmm some more…

… by the way, i really like The Believer Magazine

Nietzsche on Walking and Creativity, Maria Popova, The Marginalian… i am a walker… i walk every day… my daily goal is at least 10K steps… right now, my weekly average is close to 15K steps… i walk, i think, i make pictures… this has gotten me through the pandemic in good shape… it turns out that Maria Popova is a walker too…

Almost everything I write, I “write” in the notebook of the mind, with the foot in motion — what happens at the keyboard upon returning from the long daily walks that sustain me is mostly the work of transcription.

Maria Popova’s recommendations on reading are always compelling… i have found so much of what i read through her…

Senator Blumenthal Delivered Speech at Communist Party Awards, Brittany Bernstein, National Review… red bating is a time honored tradition of conservatives… this reads like a political hit job… is there something wrong with what Blumenthal did?… why should his wealth-by-wife be any more of an issue than Mitch McConnel’s?… i am fine with socialist policies… not so much with communism… i also believe in freedom of association and speech…

Gone Too Far, Brendan Dougherty, The National Review… refreshing for this substantially right of center magazine to publish an article stating that:

But the riot at the Capitol happened because President Donald Trump simply lied, and lied, and lied. On that very day he lied about what the vice president’s powers were. “All Vice President Pence has to do is send it back to the states to recertify, and we become president, and you are the happiest people,” he told the crowd.

Walking… a man with a boxer dog… as we pass the dog lunges, grazing the back of my legs… the man restrains the dog which continues to lunge at me… no! he says to the dog… sorry he says to me… it’s not enough… as i walk away i wonder if i should have taken a picture of the man and his dog for Facebook…

Morning walk, Trax on 52

… i spend the bulk of my time writing an email to a woman who wants to know where she can show her photography… it’s an extensive response…

Walking, Photographs

Walking, Photographs

Walking, Photographs (2021.10.29)

Walking

… Amazon Prime truck squawking like a deranged corvid bird as it backs up… special Halloween backup sound?…

… hike to the Mount Beacon trail entrance on 9d… as i walk through the parking lot of Bob’s Corner Store, the smell of bacon cooking… the store reminds me of stores in Maine, located at the confluence of local and hiking traffic… it is dilapidated… i had breakfast in the dining room a couple of times long ago… the floor was so shaky underfoot that i became convinced collapse was imminent… i have not gone in since… to the best of my knowledge, it has never collapsed…

… as i pass a backyard filled with play equipment, i remember a tether ball pole my father tried to set in the ground in a hole with stones wedged in to keep it upright and still… the setup wasn’t up to the vigorous play we gave it… the pole quickly loosened and became wobbly…

… i stop in Barb’s and pick up a chuck roast… wondering who to invite to Sunday dinner… i remember Sunday is Halloween… maybe i should freeze it and serve next weekend?…

… sitting by the dam at the Roundhouse… thick, brown sheet of water pouring over the top, breaking up into frothy caramel and white boiling at the bottom… the proverbial dull roar for sound… i remember when i first came to work in NYC i lived at my parents home in NJ and commuted through Hoboken train station for a while… i used to walk out to the end of the platform where the Engine throbbed away, waiting to haul passengers to their assorted towns… it gave a thrill to stand right next to the powerful engine… the power of the falls and rapids gives me a similar feeling…

Walking

… down to the river… an eagle calls out… i look up to see it glide by… heading somewhere rapidly…

… seagulls, corvids, geese, eagles, all on the move this morning…

… the tide is really high today, and past it’s peak… wonder if the recent rain has anything to do with it?…

… eagles very active… lots of calling… three eagles cavorting?, arguing? Courting?…

… lots of water running across the landscape towards the river… two days after the big rain event…

… as i approach Madame Brett Park, the sound of raging rapids…

Walking, Photographs

Walking, Photographs

Walking

… cloudy, dark, windy… car plastered with pine needles…

… at the Roundhouse i stop on the bridge over Fishkill Creek and thrill to the raging rapids… heavy rain yesterday, heavy rapids today… i like to think of the spot as a cosmic destructive/creative rip in the time/space continuum… one of countless numbers in the cosmos…

… a distant drumming, as if someone were banging on the bottom of a giant plastic bucket…

… siting by the side of Fishkill Creek… banks normally walkable are flooded…

… now sitting on a bench across the street from the falls… this bench is notable for an attractive and friendly young woman who sits here with her dog in the early morning…

Walking, Photographs

Walking

… a young couple passes with luggage, hustling towards the train station… a delivery truck pulls out in front of a car driving down Main Street, leaving it little time to stop… an emphatic protest honk…

… a mannequin at lucky 31 clothing has changed into a black dress and is sporting, for a change, a sensible handbag…

… a short, stout woman, with gray hair pulled back in a bun, stands outside her building watching a video on her iPad… we say good morning and inquire about each others state of being, which is good by both accounts… i see this woman most mornings…

… the aftermath of a pleasant fall weekend, overflowing garbage bins everywhere…

… rainy day… i confine my walk to Main Street… i sit down on the steps at the falls, accepting the probability of dampening my derrier… releasing my back… as i consider the pain in my back i wonder about exercising to strengthen my stomach muscles…

… as i walk along the downstream side of the bridge near Roundhouse, i remember a chance encounter with M and their spouse P, near this spot… i catch M’s eyes and they are radiant… their smile… their green hair… the warmth of recognition layered with longtime affection… even as they lean into P, holding their hand, love obvious… every encounter with this creature is beguiling… i worry that P has noticed i only have eyes for M…

… a third of the way back along Main Street the sensation something is missing… my umbrella!… left at the falls… i turn around to head back and retrieve…

… a young woman pushing a stroller, expressionless… as we pass i notice there is no child in the stroller or nearby… i have a momentary flash of a child lost and a grief stricken mother pushing an empty stroller around as if waiting for the child to reappear and take a seat… she, suspended between incomprehension of loss and acceptance…

… the umbrella is where i left it… i pick it up and set out on my second attempt to return home…

Walking, Photographs

Walking

… cool and wet this morning… cloudless sky… car down the street ignites and hums towards warm, driver rolling windows down and up to clear the dew…

… cleaning woman unloading equipment and supplies to the front steps of the Telephone Building… i wish her good morning… “Good morning sir,” she replies… her music drifts out the rear end of her car…

… birds twittering…

… part of Main Street improvements are new two posted directional signs… the extra post feels unnecessary and unattractive…

… i have made my way down to the falls… the cold is reaching in through my extremities… hands tingling and slightly cumbersome…

… no word on chickens…

… waiting for the warmth of the sun… was i out extra early or is it arriving late?…

Walking, Photographs

Walking

… cold, cloudy… i am walking along thinking about restricting myself to iPhone and apps for a while… not using Lightroom for a while as my perspective continues to change on what i am doing, where i am going…

Walking, Photographs


Walking, Pictures

Walking, Bald Eagle Sighting

… beautiful, near cloudless day… waning gibbous moon… light human activity… drumming circle starting to form… birds twittering… excitement over the sighting of an eagle… a man asks those closer if there is an eagle in the tree… yes!, the reply… he calls out to “Roger” across the way to tell him about the eagle… the man shuffles by on his way to get a closer look… i comment on “the eagle tree”… he tells me he used to bring his mom every day… i conclude his mother has passed or moved away or is otherwise not able to be brought to the waterfront anymore… i am touched by the humanity of the moment… the sound of drumming… the feeling of a sacred ritual… as i walk away, the sound of an eagle calling…

Walking Pictures

Walking

… train horn blasting in the distance… very insistent… beautiful colors in the sky…

… i pass by Lucky Thirty One clothing and marvel at the really bad purse choices of their mannequins…

… thinking about my cast iron pans this morning… i’ve gone from using them occasionally to using them all the time… they are fully seasoned, mostly non stick, have not required abrasive scrubbing in a long time, clean up easily… i have one more non stick pan to try to replace…

… a couple of crow/ravens arguing in mid air…

… insistent emergency sirens in the distance…

Walking (yesterday)

… cold this AM… not sure i dressed warmly enough…

… K walking their dog… they say good morning… we discuss how cold it is…

… no clouds… sun isn’t up yet… air is clear and still…

… sitting by the falls…

… a possible way to curate my photos… color in the Apple ecosystem, b&w in Lightroom… color when shared the same day… b&w thereafter… rules… there always need to be defining rules…

… returning home… bird tweeting loudly… other birds twittering in hushed tones…

… photos from the walk…

Walking

… chilly this morning… an air conditioner running…

… my back hurts… i should start stretching again…

… the undertow is towing… deep breath… be in the moment…

… unfettered happiness seems a difficult proposition…

Walking

… step out the front door… rain drops lingering on the car… air crisp, chilled… street flushed by rain… birds twittering…

… the undertow is with me this morning… deep breathing to settle it down…

… another jeweler?… there are several on Main Street already… steadily increasing luxuriance…

… as i walk, a tribe of finches flit from place to place keeping just ahead of me… am i chasing them or are they leading me?…

… L wishes me good morning… walking their dog… i notice they have allowed their hair to be gray…

…more signs of luxuriance…

… sitting near the falls at the roundhouse… three people messing with light poles on the terrace… taking them in for the winter?…

… the sun clears a building nearby, warmth spreading down the left side of my head… deep breath… be present to it…

… a father changes the diaper of a crying baby in the back seat of a car…

… a girl with fairy wings strapped on her back sits with her father outside a donut shop… the pinks and greens of the girl’s sweatshirt and father’s flannel shirt are dazzling in the morning sun…

… a caravan of venders popping up in the DMV parking lot… farmer’s market today…

… pictures of what i noticed along the way…