… 231.2 lbs…

… Heather Cox Richardson about the accomplishments of the administration, which are considerable… and yet, the people are not happy and Republicans may succeed in steering us to a one party state…

Love or hate what Biden has done, he has managed to pull a wide range of countries together to stand against Russian president Vladimir Putin’s authoritarian attack in Ukraine, and he has managed to get through a terribly divided Congress laws to make the lives of the majority better, even while Republicans are rejecting the idea that the government should reflect the will of the majority. That is no small feat.

Whether it will be enough to prove that democracy is still a viable form of government is up to us.¹

… i believe in the messy multiarchy… i hope more people can look at what is going on and support democracy… i am pessimistic about that…

… last night we watched Blue Bayou, a movie centered on the deportation of a Korean American who was adopted but for whom the appropriate paperwork had never been completed… apparently there are 25K to 50K adoptees from foreign countries that have the same problem… how is it possible that there isn’t some kind of understanding in the system that it isn’t the adoptee’s fault that the paperwork was not done or done properly?… how are we so tied to the rules that we can’t see our way to making an exception for this class?… how are we sending people back to countries they have never known and can’t even speak the language?… i read the wikipedia write up on the movie and learn that a law passed in 2000 made many in this legalization limbo citizens, it did not cover those 18 and older at the time…

… i read about bird flu killing tens of thousands of seabirds… i wonder if this is something related to climate change… i read the article to the end… it’s not… i remember B warning us that the flu was going around and to mask and glove up when we cared for the chickens this past winter… i wonder about the meat birds coming… tomorrow i think…

… because we have at least one in town, this article on Little Libraries caught my attention… the trend started in Wisconsin as a memorial to the mother of Todd Bol, who was a schoolteacher…

… monkeypox continues to grow as an issue around the globe… i feel like i am reading too much about this new disease of concern… i have read it is only spread through direct contact… is that changing?…

… an article on Tony Wang in Ain’t Bad… i almost don’t click on it, but then do… wait… i know this guy’s work!… he showed at the last Salon… he showed the very work published in the article… he was testing the sequencing… way to go Tony… hope we see you again!…

… Kitchen and Coffee after a walk down Main Street… not many pictures… not much that inspired an effort… it’s Sunday so i treat myself to hot chocolate… it is a spiritual experience… i really have to try making it at home…

… published yesterday’s notes… getting ready to publish yesterday’s group of photos… the things i look at… pay attention to… Gilbert O’Sullivan, _Alone Again (Naturally)_ playing on the sound system…

… haven’t heard that song in a long time…

… signs of Beacon Open Studios around town… wanted to go to some of the studios but the heat dampened my enthusiasm… lots of evidence of people in town… lots of cars parked on streets adjacent to Main Street, where they aren’t during the week… not as many people on the street as there are when the weather is better…

… it’s no longer projected to be 100 today… top out at 96 or 97… cooler tomorrow but more 90 degree weather heading our way next week…

… some more Etel Adnan…

Within seconds, X rays and gamma rays have hit us at light speed. A cloud of nuclear particles at 5 million miles an hour engulfs everybody’s brain. We are monitoring the universe in real time.²

… i read from dot to dot… making my way slowly through the book… usually, there is a passage that jumps out… today it was the above… the idea of monitoring the universe in real time… do we have nuclear particle receptors and don’t know it?… will we one day figure out how to tap into them?… will our minds then expand to be the universe?… will we loose our selves when this happens?… will it be hive mind?… i think about how, in my society, everything is geared towards being the unique, outstanding (good or bad) individual… we are to brand ourselves… make ourselves into a recognized and marketable quantity… is this the right way to think about being?… should we, instead, enjoy our selfness quietly… i oscillate on this… being part of the fabric, undistinguished, doesn’t bring resources… it does bring community?…

… just now i am thinking about how the patriarchal Oligarchs want to remake American society… i hope we can stop them…

… paid the bills…

… edited this morning’s pictures…

… bought the makings of ratatouille at the farmers market… especially wonderful dish in the summer with fresh vegetables… i will cook it on the Green Egg with the hope that it will develop a smokey flavor on top of the oven caramelized flavors this recipe develops… i post my intentions to Micro.blog and Facebook…

…232.2 lbs…

… the dogs get me up at 3:30 AM… wanted to stay in bed till 4 but… Fiona pacing the room… i think an animal was passing through our neighbor’s yard… the other day we saw a skunk family pass through… we seem to finally have secured the perimeter of our fence so Fiona isn’t getting out and animals aren’t getting in… except for squirrels…

… H has become determined to attract humming birds to the yard… we’ve had many sightings of them this year… we have flowers in the garden they are attracted to… she wants them to come to the feeders… so far, not much activity there… we have many feeders now… she is trying to find the perfect one… i hope they come to her feeders…

… we made pizza on the green egg last night… tending a fire more bearable than i would have thought in this heat… today and tomorrow are the peak of the heat wave… high 90’s… 100 predicted for tomorrow…

… a story in Hyperallergic about a mural in Queens defaced by Sony Spider Man additions and now restored…

… the mural, “Queens is the Future,” created by Eve Biddle and Joshua Frankel…

… an article about Abby Manzella, a micro fiction writer and host of Micro, a podcast… her 400 word piece, Lepidoptera, mentioned… a story about a little girl in the midst of a pandemic… she wakes up with butterfly wings one day… a paragraph about how she writes into her phone at night to get ideas off her mind… how this one emerged almost fully formed… i think, yes, i write into my phone… i have been trying to write more… this will be inspiration…

… this from Maria Popova in the Marginalian this morning…

By the time we can even begin answering for ourselves the question of whether or not is worth living, myriad things have been answered for us by the fundamental forces that have conspired into the confluence of chance that is our self. None of us choose the bodies or brains or neurochemistries we are born with, the time and place we are deposited into, the parents we are raised by, the culture we are cultured in. Any sense of choice we might have is already saturated with these chance inheritances and is therefore, as James Baldwin so astutely observed, part illusion and part vanity.¹

… the post is about Gwendolyn Brooks’s poem, To The Young Who Want To Die… wait another day… see what’s coming around the corner… wait another day…

… i, myself, have never been suicidal… depression is not frequent with me and never very deep… i once played with suicide, as a kid, in the basement of my parents home… i made a noose… attached it to the steel beam supporting the joists of the house and carefully lowered myself to feel the noose tighten around my neck… i had no intention of swinging from the beam… i only wanted to know what it felt like… when i think back on it, i think… what if i had slipped and hung myself… the world would have thought i was sad… there would have been no clue as to why… i would have seemed a generally happy boy… i don’t think my troubles with my father had started by then, beyond his being a strict disciplinarian… there is a short story in this… i should try to write it… something involving Schrodinger’s cat… am i alive or dead?…

… an article in Mother Jones about an article in Axios that H told me about yesterday… it’s about how the MAGA group plan to remake government when they get in office… fill it with cronies… and then leave the subsequent administration with the choice of doing their own cronies make over or returning to the bureaucratic state of olden times… i think, what makes them think there will be another administration if that plan is successfully carried out?… this would be the mostly white patriarchy taking over and never letting go… this would be the end of the multiarchy… oh god, why must we contend with this shit?… 45 must never be responsible for anything in government again…

… an article about Pelosi’s planned trip to Taiwan and China’s threat to retaliate “forcefully.”… there seem to be so many ways the world could go sideways right now…

… another review of Nope further reinforces that i want to see it… H feels the same way…

… Ukraine is winning… i read the article… i nod to its arguments… it lightens my mood a bit, but, i wonder, i still don’t see the end game where Putin retreats with tail between legs… another one that could easily go sideways…

… a Jonathan Blaustein review of the photobook Kyanite Miners… i don’t share his opinion of the book… it’s slick, corporate, meant to promote the mining company… it’s competent… i don’t think it is pushing any boundaries…

… Kitchen and Coffee… the handsome bleach blond dude barista… he is less personable than the women… i wonder how women customers respond to his handsomeness?… he reminds me of a young Paul Hollywood…

… as i walk down Main Street i am thinking about writing a short story about a boy toying with a noose… i am thinking that i will write multiple stories within a story, one where the boy toys with the noose, satisfies his curiosity and then takes the noose apart and goes on with his life… another in which he slips and accidentally hangs himself… others in which various plausible scenarios play out, including that he wishes to die, is not only playing with the idea of death… could be a very interesting story…

… i am liking my return to routine and structured workflow… for so many weeks things were moving all about… i was making pictures, writing, but not in the routine and rhythmic way i am now… i have started posting titled journal entries on a daily basis… each day i publish the previous day’s entry… they are Notes On Attention Paid… each day i am posting a selection of photographs taken that day… they are also Notes On Attention Paid… it’s that simple…

… on the way here, a bunch of male sexual performance enhancement packaging on the ground… i photograph all of them… one has the words “rock hard” on it… i don’t know, sounds painful to me… anyway, i am thinking today’s image post will include a number of them, may be only them…

The starting point of infinity is always at the center, where mind resides. Behind an image there’s an image. Nothingness is Being’s foundation, put on stage by poetry, which makes the erotic and the intellect meet. It’s not life, it’s alive.²

… 231.8 lbs…

… stayed up to watch the J6 Select Committee hearing… it detailed 45’s determination that the capitol riot should stop the election from being certified by congress… there was not a huge amount of new information, but there was more flesh put on the bones, so to speak… whether it is yet demonstrable in a court of law, it is clear that 45 wanted and motivated the insurrection and that he had control of the mob, could have ended it at any time, but only did so when he saw the gambit had failed… of particular note to me was the way in which Liz Cheney reached out to women… she praised the women, by name, who had come forward to testify and reminded women of how hard they had to fight to win the right to vote… this from Heather Cox Richardson this AM…

At the end of the hearing, Cheney praised the witnesses, especially the women. She offered special thanks to Cassidy Hutchinson, who “knew all along that she would be attacked by President Trump, and by the 50-, 60-, and 70-year-old men who hide behind executive privilege,” but had courage to testify nonetheless. Cheney mentioned the female witnesses by name, saying they were “an inspiration to American women and to American girls.” ¹

… and…

Speaking especially to the American women whose votes will be key to the upcoming election, she noted that the room in which they were meeting was where the committee on women’s suffrage met in 1918. We… “have a solemn obligation not to idly squander what so many Americans have fought and died for.” ²

… the committee reminded us that the threat is not over… that 45 is still trying to claim the election was stollen, still has the same devout followers enthralled and ready to go and still poses a threat to democracy…

… just posted a reply on HCR about Liz Cheney’s callout to women at the end of the hearing…

… this sculpture by Ai Weiwei is beautiful in appearance and concept…

… i read this review of Nope and confirm the already growing feeling that i would like to see it…

… an article on Crazy Kat and e e cummings is an intriguing read… i read it from beginning to end… one of George Herriman’s strips in the article…

… as i get the coffee ready for H, i am reminded of the sugar water spill she left last night… the floor a sticky mess… i get the mop out, set it up, leave instructions for how to use it…

… i head for Kitchen and Coffee… in a leisurely way… making photographs as i go… at one corner i stop to make a picture and two women in head scarves walk out from behind the building… they stop… i did not want people in the picture… one woman walks back behind the building… the other looks after her… i decide to make the picture with the woman in it… she turns at the instant i snap the picture and looks at me… i wonder if she somehow felt the camera on her… as i was editing yesterdays journal entry i ran across this…

… i think about this… divine attracts consciousness with the power of the sea’s liquid material manifestations… without consciousness, is there any divine?… the pansychic idea that everything has awareness… material at its most basic level has awareness, even if only attraction to that which attracts and in turn is attracted… this is the base level of awareness… to “know” something is adjacent…

… i am even more intrigued by the idea that she sensed me taking the picture and turned to see… i am not sure she liked that i did, but it was at a distance…

… loud talking barista is here today, though being relatively quiet… she is wearing a grey knit top and black stretch shorts down to just above her knees… i note that she has tattoos on both arms…

… the music is soft, easy to ignore… LM barista is talking about going to the pool after work…

… Etel Adnan…

In between there was Greece and Rome, but Rome’s gods, unlike Greece’s, seem to have left for good.³

… i think about this… it rings true… so much of western civilization resting on the foundations of ancient Greece, not Rome… EA observes that God “could be absolute darkness or absolute light,” and i think the only absolute is darkness, when it happens… the absence of light, the absence of consciousness… is there such a thing?… God, EA tells me, is “born out of the fear of pain, decay, or disappearance”… i nod, but my fears don’t create god for me except as absolute darkness… i reject the existence a separate from me they are everywhere and everything all at once… it is meaningless to consider God as some kind of apartness… which is the stance of worshiping, i and thou… rather… god… like the sea, is immersion, we simply can’t separate ourselves from God, if she exists… so what is worship but a kind of arrogance of the worshiper?… there is no point in naming Gods except to name ourselves… “eternity is death’s favorite name” EA tells me… “only consciousness is life,” and consciousness ends… or does it?… yes, in any way meaningful to me here and now… but perhaps not in general…

… a mother asking her toddler Ben what number he is… ten is apparently the right answer, i don’t know why… he’s a toddler, not a ten year old, so i don’t know the significance of ten to Ben… she makes a picture of him as he says to her “ten”… maybe a short video, that would make more sense… dad seems to prefer Benjamin to Ben…

… finished editing photos taken today… ran some errands to gather food for dinner and for dogs… on the way back stopped in a friends wine store and found out their son is sick… in the hospital… doctors not sure what is going on yet… they are waiting for more test results… then he told me his daughter’s dog had cancer and nothing can be done… a bad week he said… i did my best to comfort… glad he told me about it…

… chicken duties today… will plan to get there right at 5:30 as coup is likely to be hot… don’t want the chickens to be cooped up too early… some storms in the area… may cool things down a bit…

… i am delayed in my chicken duties by a thunderstorm passing through… as i am going to the car, a lightning bolt flashes in the near distance… i go back inside and watch the progression of the storm on my weather app… when it is safe i get in the car and go…

… 222.8 lbs…

… been walking more the past couple of days, in the morning… no afternoon labor… snacking more?… eating more?… definitely drinking more… was doing better with shorter, more contemplative walks, but that was coupled with afternoon labor…

… i am determined to loose some weight…

… HCR depressing this AM, for its discussion of climate change and the inability of the US to get its act together… Republicans are uniformly against any legislation that promotes a fossil fuel free future, as is Joe Manchin, who claims fighting inflation now is more important than fighting climate change… inflation is a problem that will only get worse as climate change continues to unfold… fighting it is fighting inflation…

… i read a recipe for “The Ultimate Focaccia” by Paul Hollywood, of the Great British Baking Show… i resolve to make it… i love to cook… and as Hollywood suggests:

Baking is all about sharing. Even after more than three decades in many different professional roles, nothing beats making something for someone else and seeing their eyes light up when they taste it.

… i am hoping to add focaccia to my repertoire…

… an article entitled Sam Gregg’s Captivating Portraits Capture the “Humanity” of Naples… i have a look and think he’s made them look rather disappointed with life… nobody smiles… everyone looks at you as if they are suspicious of you… photographs of details of the environment seem uninspired… at the beginning of the article he mentions how friendly they are… it’s not at all evidenced in the photographs…

… i am reminded my own photography is moving forward again… i have established a new work flow… i have begun building the weekly edit portfolios again, working in the present and backwards a little at a time…

… an article, How Joel Meyerowitz Became a Pioneer of Colour Photography… ah!, a modern master, I will like his work better… and i do, but don’t see pictures i never would have thought to make, except one of a young woman about to bite into a strawberry… i don’t photography people… he manages sensuality very effectively with the soft focus and the trope of a strawberry… i see a photography that comes from the last century… still great photography but one thinks the world has moved on…

It seems impossible to imagine there was ever a time when colour photography was not regarded as an art form. But for decades, the art world dismissed colour as commercial at best, closing ranks and excluding groundbreaking photographers for years. “When I first started shooting I shot in colour,” Meyerowitz says. “A year later, I started shooting in black and white because I couldn’t print colour in 1962. I only had slides to show people and I noticed they didn’t look at them very long. They treated them like everybody’s travel photos.”

… as i read the article i begin to see the art of the photograph of the young woman… made in low light with a relatively slow exposure… she can’t help but move a little and this is what softens her image…

… the article is promotional for Meyerowitz’s new exhibition, Between the Dog and the Wolf

… Anna Leigh Clem, i thought, i know this photographer, she used to come to salon in Woodstock… i look through the work and i believe it has evolved as it is more comprehensible as a story than it was, at least in this selection of images…

… bravo Anna!…

… another article on Great Women Artists, a survey of women painters over 500 years… i have put it on my list at Amazon… liked this painting by Hayv Kahraman…

… a leisurely walk down Main Street leaves me sweaty… the day will be hot… but then i knew that…

… continuing to think about the work of Anna Clem and about reaching out to her, letting her know i enjoyed the Booooooom! post…

… on the way out the door, i photograph tomatoes and think it will be a good picture… in the front there is a Carolina Swallowtail butterfly… it comes closer to work the flowers in front of me… i photograph it… i think these photos will be good too…

… loud talking barista is here this morning… i order decaf with a little agave in it… she squeezes out some agave onto a spoon and stirs it into my coffee… i think that is nice… she is wearing corduroy shorts that end just above her knees… they are green… she has a blue t-shirt… smallish breasts, a bit of a tummy and generous hips… if i make her sound fat, she is not… she could be one day, but not now… i notice one tattoo on her right upper arm… she is pierced through her right eyebrow…

… there was no coffee to set up for H… have to bring some home with me… looking at the coffees here there doesn’t seem enough information to help me make a decision on any of the packages… they are all only 12 ounces too, which annoys me…

… an older gentleman in a British golf cap walks down the aisle, sets his bag and a folder of documents down at a table… he returns up front to get whatever he will get…

… two women walk from the back to the front… they are similar in stature and wear identically colored, though not identical, blouse/shirts… are they a couple?…

… this from Sea and Fog, Etel Adnan…

The divine is not spatial but needs space, is not material but needs matter, is not human but needs consciousness, is not a work of beauty but needs the sea’s power of attraction.

… i think about this… divine attracts consciousness with the power of the sea’s liquid material attraction… without consciousness, is there any divine?… but then there is the pansychic idea that everything has awareness… material at its most basic level has awareness, even if attraction to that which attracts it and in turn is attracted… this is the base level of awareness… to know something is adjacent…

… out of this i think about the rock on Block Island… i am aware of it… is it aware of me?… to the extent that we are bodies with mass and therefore gravitational attraction… we warp the space around us and between us… at least that is how i understand it…

… i publish yesterday’s journal entry and photographs and walk… i included a map… have forgotten to turn on the map this morning… i need to do a routine that asks me to turn it on and off as i leave and return to the house…

… after editing today’s photos… also some photos from previous weeks… working on getting caught up… making progress… deciding that iPhone photos are difficult to do as color… wondering if i need to try to do them in the apple photo app… they always seem to look better in black and white, at least as developed in Lightroom…

Heather Cox Richardson, July 20, 2022

Paul Hollywood: How to Make the Ultimate Focaccia

Sam Gregg’s Captivating Portraits Capture the “Humanity” of Naples

How Joel Meyerowitz Became a Pioneer of Colour Photography

Artist Spotlight: Anna Leigh Clem

… we unearthed some crab mac and cheese from the freezer last …night… so good… had seconds and did more snacking than i should have… also, a couple of vodka tonics and wine… all together, a bit calorific… more exercise yesterday than other days…

… just looked up the weather… mid 90’s through Sunday, when temps are projected to hit 100… not so unusual this time of year…

… some struggle with Lightroom yesterday… but got work done… wound up with not much to do in afternoon…

… HCR about SS deletion of texts from Jan 5 and 6… about 45 still trying to overturn election… about the election fraud investigation in Georgia… Arizona House Speaker Rusty Bowers being formerly censured by the Arizona Republican Party… for doing the right thing… protests in front of the Supreme Court where a number of legislators were arrested, including Carolyn Maloney, AOC… Lauren Robel filing a misconduct complaint against Todd Rosita who went on Fox News and said the doctor treating the ten year old rape victim had not done proper filings with the state when she had… the house passing a bill to protect gay marriage… will the senate follow?… 54 Republicans unwilling to go on record against gay marriage… 70% of all Americans and 55% of Republicans support gay marriage… including, i recently learned… Liz Cheney…

… then there is the Idaho Republican party which has included a plank in it’s platform that abortion is illegal in all circumstances, including those in which the mother’s life is at stake and the fetus won’t survive … Scott Herndon, running for the Idaho Senate sponsored the platform amendment saying…

“For the last 49 years we have essentially lost the argument in the culture because we have focused on abortion as the termination of a pregnancy and not the termination of a living human being,” Herndon said to fellow delegates, according to the Idaho Capital Sun. “We will never win this human rights issue, the greatest of our time, if we make allowances for the intentional killing of another human being.

… a man of course… doesn’t have to deal with the consequences… how could any woman support such a stance unless blinded by the Christian Patriarchy… this kind of stupidity makes the best case against religion of any kind… so much unnecessary suffering…

… another article reviewing the landscape of abortion battles across the nation… suggest sthat several polls show Dems picking up momentum in spite of Biden Administration poor approval ratings and a number of issues that normally drive voters away from the party in power… this all actually has the feel to me of an issue that will rapidly settle itself into national legislation as the horror stories start to proliferate… question is… who will be in control after 2024…

Among overall registered voters, 41 percent said they would prefer to see a Democrat-controlled Congress after the midterms, while 40 percent said they would opt for a Republican-controlled one. Republicans led by 1 percentage point among likely voters. The poll was based on responses from 849 registered voters in early July.

… this from an article on John Coltrane’s A Love Supreme and Buddhism…

Most music has a structure and purpose leading to a resolution.

… this struck me immediately as a condition of life… we want structure, purpose and resolution… so much of our entertainment industry is built on telling stories with structure, purpose and resolution… but what if such a thing is an illusion at best?… we are only passing through… there is nothing about individual lives that is a resolution to anything… we are all part of a greater flow and we do our best to swim within that flow in ways that give us hope and purpose… or at least i do… lately i have struggled with hope… struggled with purpose… in part… this is a condition of getting older… as time on earth runs short, we wonder what our purpose was?… we wonder, was there any meaning to it?… more from the article…

One can engage the sand mandala on many levels; its beauty, its precision, the mastery required to produce it, or the patterns and protection it offers towards awakening. But in the end, we cannot hold onto any of these as the mandala is destroyed and dispersed as a reminder of our own impermanence and return to our primordial source.

… i come to the end of my personal feeds so i suppose it might be time to go for a walk… make some pictures… get a coffee or hot chocolate… maybe down by the river today…

… later, after a long walk by the river… K&C… intense delicate tattooed barista at the helm this AM… she remembers me from last week… i commented on her tattoos favorably last week… still like them this week… she remembers me like we have seen each other more than once, which i don’t think we have…

… i start writing in my analog journal, then switch here… if i were to write something more penetrating, i would only need to copy it here… i don’t think the analog method offers enough perceptible benefit to make it the prevalent place to write…

… it is hot chocolate this morning… i decided the effort of the walk required it… also, needed something to feed my energy level…

… crying baby… my their voices can be so penetrating!… hard to tolerate… my immediate thought is get the baby out of here… this is peaceful morning time… why does the kid get to interrupt it that way?… it’s not a generous response… my ultimate tolerance is more generous… she walks down the aisle with her mother and gives me a charming almost smile while looking at me intently… mom takes her outside where she will be less of annoying if she cry/screams again… thank you mom…

Reading Etel Adnan, Sea and Fog, this…

Not ever hesitating, waves surge to reach human speech. They propose a truce. When we forget Ahab and converse only with Moby-Dick, the universe will manifest itself in full clarity.

… Moby Dick… one of my favorite reads… the message, forget human hubris and insanity, commune with nature, this is our salvation, or could be, if we’d dispense with appetite culture… if 45 is Ahab, are we Moby Dick?, no, we are the unwitting and unwilling among the crew… where then is Moby Dick?… the multiarchy… the misunderstood mythical beast… yes it is we who are being hunted to be extinguished…

… mother with baby, this one not a toddler, not noisy, not screaming just to hear itself scream…

… and the following paragraph from Sea and Fog…

And the sea ceased to be because it became the sea, and we stopped at the station of impermanence, and rose from our bewilderment to witness the junction of the past with the present.

… and this…

The uncontrollable desire to think the fleeting elements of the world, to fuse them into images, into words, is probably the most hypnotic of all Eros' manifestations.

… i find a Paris Review article on Etel Adnan, Sea and Fog: The Art of Etel Adnan… i read this quote…

“My writing and my paintings do not have a direct connection in my mind. But I am sure they influence each other in the measure that everything we do is linked to whatever we are, which includes whatever we have done or are doing. But in general, my writing is involved with history as it is made (but not only) and my painting is very much a reflection of my immense love for the world, the happiness to just be, for nature, and the forces that shape a landscape.”

… i think about my own practice and how i seem lost right now… i am encouraged to reengage…

Heather Cox Richardson, July 19, 2022

Idaho State GOP Says Abortion Should Be Illegal, Even When Used to Save a Woman’s Life

The abortion law fight grows in Texas and Wet Virginia. Here’s what you missed

Awakening with “A Love Supreme”

Etel Adnan, Sea and Fog

Sea and Fog: The Art of Etel Adnan

First notes

228.8 lbs

… the new year in NOAP officially begins… i sit here, wondering what to write, knowing that i should just start writing and something will surface…

… the salient features of yesterday…

… my traditional new year’s day walk by the river interrupted by the escape of Fiona… situation resolved by the time i get home…

… after making a french omeltte for breakfast, i go out to the back yard and repair the hole in the fence through which Fiona escaped and reinforced the bottom of the fence in places not previously reinforced… i recommend to H that she still escort the dogs out to the back yard… Fiona is fiendishly clever about escape… it’s a horrible feeling when a dog you love escapes and goes for a walkabout… it’s happened a number of times with her… a number of times she has been contained by neighbors who call, or bring her back… speaking of dogs… Chas is whining to be let out of the bedroom…

… when i go out with the dogs i discover it is still raining… it’s been gray and dreary since we returned from our southern sojourn… it will get cold tonight… even colder Monday night… down into the teens…

… dogs let out, treated, returned to bedroom with H… the next few hours are mine… i put on my headphones, cue up Bach Cello Suites, Paul Tortelier the performer… i should have them memorized by now and on a certain level they are, on another level, they are not…

… yesterday i was thinking about books i have recently read, about Etel Adnan’s lovely book, Shifting the Silence, that i can’t remember a single detail of… nothing… is it that they weren’t significant enough to me to emblazon some message on my brain?… or, is my mind getting old and not retaining the way it used to… possibly a combination of the two…

… and so the year has begun… i have trepedation about this new year… i believe the political situation will continue to get worse… the climate will continue to get worse… the world situation will continue to get worse… possibly the only challenge that may not get worse is the pandemic… how much worse could it get?… at any rate, the new and really contagious variant does not seem to be as virulent… that can be a sign that it is burning itself out… one can hope… H was wondering if we should restart instacart for most groceries… i am not fully there yet… i think i will try going to markets at times when there are few people there… early in the AM… that’s my super power… being able to get going earlier than most…

… we did some shopping and food making for a young family, half of which is down with covid, despite being vaccinated, boosted and cautious, masking up when appropriate, avoiding crowds as best they can… they are frustrated, something about parents at daycare being antivaxers… we offered to continue to help, bring food, run errands…

… i notice there is snow forecasted for Friday, 3-6 inches… that is far enough out that it could easily change before then…

… what do i want to get done today?… photo walk… writing… make breakfast… farmer’s market… family zoom call… clean stovetop… vacuum… read… more writing… what should i pay attention to?…

Kitchen and Coffee Cafe

… cold this morning… i decide to stop at K&C at opening, 7 AM, it’s a bit of a madhouse… the Thanksgiving orders in the final stages of assembly… the tables all covered with bags of gluten-free baked goods… much busier than i expected…

… i open up Shifting the Silence by Etel Adnan… she writes about Barrett Watten, Plan B…

… i finish Shifting the Silence, read about Etel Adnan… she studied philosophy, became a painter, became a poet, became a novelist, a journalist… very accomplished…

Shifting the Silence, Etel Adnan

… Kevin Killian and elements is metioned… KK is a poet, playwright and more… he died in 2019… elements refers to The Elements, a book of poems only published in French right now…

Life is daily, death is eternal; it means that eternity is useless. We live as if we knew that: we hang on details, keep searching, to keep the illusion alive, the illusion that things matter. But is that mere illusion? I don’t always think so.¹

… we all hope there is more to things than this daily life, many of us even accept there is not… but not quite…

Too much of a past, too little ahead, but wait a minute, we always lived day to day, so where’s the difference?²